Welcome all those who followed the link from my Xanga site. I do not anticipate updating this site, but you are more than welcome to peruse the archives of this blog.

I like Blogger... but I think Xanga has a bit more to offer. So, I've moved. I will begin posting my infrequent thoughts or reports on my life at

http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=Theosebeia

Rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated….

Yes, I know that I have yet again there has been a long drought in posts to this blog. However, the school year has started back up and I need a dumping ground for my thoughts and experiences.

I just had a great experience today. One of the assignments for my Prayer class is to meet with someone to pray for an hour. Well, I met today and we prayed, and prayed and soon the hour was gone. I was absolutely amazed. I had thought that it would be a burden to spend a whole hour in prayer, but it wasn’t. It flew by. I was also worried that I might run out of things to pray about. But, you know what? When you pray with another person you find that you get ideas and they spur you on.

Reflecting on that time of prayer my thought no longer is look how much we fit in to that hour, but look how much I didn’t pray about. It’s exciting to me to have that hour in front of me for the remainder of the semester, and who knows, perhaps it will continue beyond the semester.

Well, I’m recovering from a cold and that kinda wiped out any completion of homework over the weekend, I guess I’d better get back to the grindstone.

It has been a long time since I’ve updated this blog. A lot has happened, but now, school is out and I’m back from a trip to Chicago, life is a little slower now. However, I’m certain that shortly it’ll pick right back up and it’ll be a full summer until I start my senior year of college!

The end of the semester went just about as well as could be expected. I was largely pleased with my finals. I pulled all A’s with the exception of a B+ in Greek. Yes, that’s an abysmal 3.88 GPA for the semester pulling my cumulative GPA to 3.94. I know some people will be disgusted that I want to do better, but oh, well. I have it figured that I can get one more A- and still graduated Summa Cum Laude… which works out because I still have one more Bateman class to get through (yes, Bateman is the Greek prof.)

After school let out I stuck out for home, dropped off my stuff and on Sunday left for Chicago for my “cross cultural field experience.” I went with two other guys from school and we strayed at the Sunshine Gospel Ministries near Moody Bible Institute.

During the days we volunteered at A.N. Pritzker middle school, a magnet school near Wicker Park. We were place there by Urban Encounter, a church planting effort. It was a bit difficult to realize that we were there more to build a relationship with the school’s front office rather than with the kids. But, we did get to impact some kids, I got to do some math tutoring in a Learning Disabled classroom, boy was that a challenge. I got to help out a substitute teaching in a classroom one day… neither of us knew what was going on, fun! We did other random things in the school, like sweeping and vacuuming the auditorium. All in all our ministry at the school was good. I hope that doors are open for other people to have a great impact on the people that go to school there and that work there.

Tuesday night we went to Malcolm X college to help with an ESL (English Second Language) program. We went in with the goal of giving these students (mostly adults who immigrated to the US) a native English speaker to practice with. The second classroom we visited was interesting. It was their last class period and they were having a party of sorts, there was food, salsa music (due to the class’ predominately Latino populace), and dancing. We introduced ourselves and started talking with the members of the class. I sat down and started talking with some people. After a while they started to want to know if I wanted to dance. I initially resisted, I don’t know how to salsa. But, they were persistent so, eventually I relented and learned the basic step and a couple other things. This went over very well with the Latinos, they had fun seeing a white guy like me make a fool of myself, it was fun. I then showed one off some of the swing moves that I did know, salsa is close enough to swing dancing that I had a hard time keeping my swing dancing out of the salsa step.

One of the guys in our group spent most of our time there talking with one guy. Afterwards he approached us as we left and invited us for dinner the next evening. We accepted. So on Wednesday we found his apartment. Including him there were 6 people that showed up from the ESL class. Mexico, Peru, and Chile were represented. We ate and looked at his picture albums. We talked a lot. There were frequent bursts of Spanish as they tried to figure out how to say different things. It was one of my first times with that kind of language barrier present, but we managed.

They of course had beer at this gathering. As good hosts they repeatedly offered us some, we refused. After a while this led to them asking our ages, when they realized that we were old enough to drink one of the ladies asked us what “religion” we were. This led to a good conversation about the differences between Christianity and Catholicism. We had the privilege of sharing the basic tenants of our faith. They were very receptive about what we had to say. Of course we tread lightly on the issues of praying to saints and Mary. It was a time for tact and not insulting them, I think we managed to put “we disagree” in a way that didn’t’ offend them.

It was an amazing evening of just being on their turf and learning about them and sharing what we believed. We ended up spending 4 ½ hours there, incredible. It was truly the highlight of the week.

More posts on Chicago to come.

Wow, it has been a while since I've taken the time to write in my blog. I've probably lost any readers that I have, Oh well. My room-mate situation has worked out and I'm going to live with Dave, who I lived with my first two years of college. Dave and I are very different but I think we get along splendidly. I'm looking forward to it very much.

The big news in my life right now (other than the last day of classes being tomorrow) is that I may end up filling a pulpit for the summer. Yes, I may be a preacher. I've been in dialogue with a church not too far from my home, about ten to fifteen minutes away. It's a slightly scary thing, but I'm excited about the doors that God seems to be opening. I guess I'll try to step through and see if the door stays open or slams in my face.

But, before I can get to that... finals next week, Greek will be tough.

The roommate search can be incredibly frustrating. I want to get into a four man apartment, but we need to get the fourth man. Most of the people that I would want to room with are involved with student leadership and they are locked into rooms as RAs or Growth Group Leaders, sigh.

So, do I really don't know where my head will rest next school year. I guess I'll just have to wait and see.

Just when I thought that I would not get involved with the spring musical, Oklahoma, I got asked to run sound for opening weekend. Of course I said yes. When I think about it, boy was that a close call, I almost had to pay to see the show, gasp!

Anyway I have enjoyed (more or less) the rehearsals. Oklahoma is like many other musicals in that it has a rather forgettable story, but fun music. There are some dance sequences that are fun and I imagine with a bigger cast and a bigger stage (Little Theatre is very small for a musical) they would be much better.

My role as a sound guy isn’t very demanding, it is fun, however to be around my theatre friends. I haven’t been able to hang out with them like usual this semester. Hmmm, I guess not being in the cast does that.

The only downside of agreeing to do this is that it has really screwed up this week as far as homework goes. It was supposed to be a relaxing week with lots of extra time to relax and work ahead. Spending 3 ½ to 4 hours in rehearsal sort of puts a crimp on everything else. Oh, well I’ll get it all done somehow.

So, I guess I’ll do some homework now.

This past weekend I went home to see Hello, Dolly! at my alma mater (That’s the HS I graduated from if you didn’t know that). The couple that runs the drama department at the school has been doing it for 27 years. The have built the program on excellence and hard work. However, the school is moving and they are moving on as well. So, this is the last production they are overseeing.

Quietly an alumni reception was put together, a surprise party if you will. After curtain call and receiving line there were deserts and pictures from various productions over the years. There was over 100 alums there… I wouldn’t be surprised if the number was close to 200. Hey, when you impact lives in such a huge way for so long you manage to bless lots of people.

These two people were instrumental in forming who I am today. The lessons I learned from them still inform my decisions and the way I live. They believe that the job of the Christian “is not to do the extraordinary, but to do the ordinary in an extraordinary way.” As I reflect on that statement I agree with it. Yes, God may do extraordinary things through us, but he desires that we live out every day in an eternal way. Living eternally goes against a lot of our logic, it takes faith and is an extraordinary thing to see.

Anyway, Mr. & Mrs. C will be greatly missed. The glory years of my high school’s drama department have passed and they must rebuild now. It saddens me to see it happen. But more than sad I am so incredibly grateful for God bringing them into my life to teach me valuable lessons and to encourage me to be excellent.

I know this isn’t very deep… but when I got in my car yesterday to drive it for the first time since before Spring Break I said “Boy is this weird!”

A week of driving a twelve passenger van will get you used to sitting up a bit higher than a coupe.

Since I’m on my car… my tailpipe rusted through where it comes out of the muffler. So, there’s been this rattling sound as the pipe bounces around, very annoying. I crawled under my car and used a coat hanger to put it up so it wouldn’t make that noise anymore. While the car is still noisy because it’s missing part of the exhaust system, I’m glad that rattling is gone.

Here are some of my thoughts that I typed while in Florida. It was a very positive time. Remnant got along splendidly and we had lots of fellowship, fun, and ministry. I'm certain I'll ponder that a bit more later.

Monday March 1, 2004
Florida, finally. After two days of travel we are finally in the sunshine state. The weather, after the Midwest is quite something. Outside the door is a lightly clouded sky and the temperature is very, very nice.

The trip down was without incident. I enjoyed the opportunity to drive about half of it. It gave me something to focus on some of those stretches where everyone is trying to sleep. I find the opportunity to relax and just think to be a very fulfilling time (It seems like a value sheer pondering time these days).

One of our activities was “van question” basically we just took turns asking each other probing questions. Unfortunately I couldn’t participate as fully as I would have liked because I was driving. It is difficult to hear what is going on in the back row when I’m all the way in the front. This took place after dark and I found that the conversation was very stimulating to keep me alert, much more so than any song could have.

The music selection left some things to be desired at times. I do not have a great affinity for rap or country music. It’s not that I hate it, but there are other forms of music that I find much more enjoyable to listen to. However, that only made up a very small segment of the trip so I don’t have anything to complain about.

I was talking with a guy in the group before we left and he mentioned that it might be nice to be able to watch movies on the trip. So, I agreed to bring my laptop to play DVDs on during the drive. The funny thing was that no ones CD players quite worked right so we ended up using my laptop to play music on the way down. It was definitely overkill, but it did the job and did it well. Of course, having it on the road with me make me a bit nervous about it getting damaged, but I think that it will be all right. Hey, without it I wouldn’t have gotten to see Seabiscuit for the first time on Saturday (yes, I know that I’m behind the times).

On Sunday we had our first “show” on the trip. However, it would be a stretch to call it a show. We only did two skits (of course I wasn’t in either of them). It made for an easy Sunday, but it was a bit frustrating to be regaled to the equivalent of special music.

Friday March 5, 2004

I find it hard to believe how fast this week has gone, and how fast it continues to progress. So much stuff has happened that I’m not exactly certain where to begin. I suppose I should go chronologically. Monday we did a chapel service for the Sonshine Christian school. It was a small school and we had a very wide range of grades. Personally I would prefer to only do high school and up. Why? I love kids but some of our stuff is written more for an bit older audience, especially “How Deep the Father’s love” since it deals with the topic of abortion. However, having a younger section of audience produced laughter in places that I would not have expected. I suppose that each time we do our skits the audience doesn’t have to “get” what we are trying to say. It may be enough just to be those “cool college kids” that did some entertaining stuff. Later that day we went out on a river to do some boating. I would have liked to try the tubing but I didn’t have a swimming suit, so I abstained. It was fun to watch.

Tuesday was our day of fun. We went to Universal Studios. When you stop and think about the type of amusement park it is; it really is kinda stupid. Sure, they have some very sophisticated experiences, but its all make believe and doesn’t really have any long term benefit, at least when compared to how stinkin’ much it costs to get in. However, I did have a blast and it was worth it. I think the main reason why it was so fun is because Remnant stuck together and did it all as a team. When you combine that with how relaxed and uninhibited we can get with each other it makes for a very fun experience. For example, we went of the Back to the Future ride. The “delorian” that we ended up riding held 8 people, so it was just our team on this ride. In the waiting room we psyched ourselves up and the yelled and screamed at the appropriate places. It was a very fun day. After we finished at the park we went over to Spring Hill.

Spring Hill Bible Church (Baptist) (yes the sign in front of the church read just like that. We thought that it was funny that they put the Baptist in parenthesis right under the name of the church. Anyway one of our team member’s grandparents attend that church. I got to stay with them. They are a lovely old couple. They were fun to listen to talk. The husband would say something and his wife would quickly correct him if she thought that he was wrong. He also was very well read and knew theology. He made some comments that I didn’t necessarily agree with, however I thought it was intriguing that he was seeking to balance what he knew in his head with stuff written to the heart. I’m not certain that I’m comfortable with a dichotomy like the one he established, but he definitely is right in wanting to have more than just simple knowledge. I hope that I can achieve a balance in how and what I learn.

So, we did a Wednesday evening service for Spring Hill. Actually I think that it is the best service that we’ve done to this point. We had the most time and rolled out a new skit. The way we ended up arranging it was that of the first four skits, three of them we Old Testament focused and then we transitioned to New Testament/ Jesus focus. It worked really well, then our final piece looked at present day forgiveness because of what Jesus did on the cross. Afterward I think the best piece of encouragement I received was from P’s grandfather, I told him that I was glad he liked it. He said, “Liked it, it was more than liked it, I was blessed by it.” I think this is an example of why this show was so positive. The congregation really reacted well and appeared to be quite challenged by some of the stuff we had to say. Since we’ve written all but one of the skits that we do and we’ve all contributed in some way or another to every one of them, we own them and it’s very gratifying to seem them being effective.

Thursday morning we had breakfast with a couple in the Spring Hill church, both had lost their first spouse and then remarried. The guy was a retired preacher, a very wise man. When he got into advice/preaching mode I got nuggets of wisdom to chew on. I think the thing that I thought most about was his statement that “when God says ‘no,’ he’s got something much better for you.” It was challenging to ask myself if God says no to the things that I want most right now, am I willing to say, “ok” and move on? Yes, that’s a question of faith which I hope I can trust when God does say no.

We came back to Fort Myers after breakfast. The team then went to the Fort Myers beach. I decided to stay back and avoid the beach. I watched some TV, but that got boring rather quickly. So, I did some work on a paper that is due the Thursday after we get back. I got 2 or 3 pages written. It wasn’t the most enjoyable afternoon that I’ve every spent, but I needed to get that work done.

That evening we had a small service, It was interesting that we pulled out all of our monologue type skits, we only had one skit that truly had dialogue. Because of that factor I think that it is my least favorite show to this point. I like monologues, but I think that character interaction can be much more interesting to do. Afterwards we played a bit of basketball, I’m reminded that I am extremely competitive. By the time we were done I was completely drenched.

Then we went to see the Passion of the Christ. Oh, wow, it was the most intense movie no, the most intense film that I have ever seen. The way the Jesus underwent this incredible amount of suffering willingly was very powerful. I will admit I did cry during several points during the story. It is an experience that I don’t want to forget. I don’t want to be calloused to the fact that Jesus did die a horrific death. I found myself tempted to retreat into a simple artistic evaluation of it for it was very well done. There we multiple times that I marveled a the way a shot was done. Visually a remarkable achievement.

Right now I’m debating whether or not to see it again. I’m afraid that if I do I will start to become desensitized to the message of the film about the power of Christ’s suffering. The gore in it is not something easy to endure. However, I think that the movie is such an achievement that it probably should be viewed again. I don’t know I’ll have to think about it some more.
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So, that a lot of reading... I salut those who read it all.

This week has been a very interesting one. Midterms plus large paper is not a good combination. However, the paper is 5 or so pages from completion and it is looking manageable.

The real excitement is going to Florida on Saturday with Remnant. I am pumped. This will be my first spring break away from home. Yes I will miss the opportunity to almost completely veg out like I have in the past (Last year, watching Band of Brothers in like 3 days was incredible), but the chance to get to encourage the believers and get the gospel out is an awesome opportunity. The week will be packed with shows at churches, a Christian school and a youth camp. Yes, we will have some time to relax.

I suppose I don’t have much more to say. I will be certain to put a choice story of spring-break-happenings up when I get the time during the week, or dump it all at once when I get back to school.

I just got back from “Chill at the Grille.” It was an informal time to ask questions about the Seminary attached to the college. We talked about lots of things, ministry, school work, and basically just what it is like to training for ministry.

Me, being the introvert that I am, sat and pondered, soaking it all in. I have pretty much decided to go into seminary. I still have another year of college to go, but I have this undeniable sense that ministry is where I want to be, but I have no idea what type of ministry.

All of these options float in front of me. I see the academia and the scholars. I like what I see. I come back from a time like tonight and the pastoral side of ministry seems to be more appealing. Which do I choose?

I know that God has given me a good mind and a love for learning. What does that imply for future and current ministry? I know that I love the process of communicating, whether by speaking and teaching or through less direct means like drama. What does that imply for future and current ministry? Where does God want to use my skills and talents? I know I will be involved in a local church. But what capacity? Will my time be spent on a college campus and will that be my primary ministry and church involvement will be something non-vocational? Or will I be full-time in a church some where?

Sometimes I think that the appeal of the academic side of things is that in some ways it might be easier. Sure learning Hebrew and Greek is hard and thinking through theology can make your head spin, but compartmentalization can still occur. I don’t want that to happen. I don’t want to retreat behind an academic wall and stay there. If I am learning anything this semester it is how much I don’t truly know how to do Christian community, to get involved in other believers lives in a way that drives us deeper and closer to God. I want to be able to do that in a real and dynamic way. The “how” of that is still vague.

Oh, I know I’m just rattling off thoughts right now. I don’t know if I’m even making much coherent sense. I don’t think that I’ve had so much stuff in my thinking in process like this before. I’m trying to figure out what’s going on with my academics, spiritual, and relational areas of my life… it can be confusing at times.

I desperately crave prayers, and God’s guidance. He will lead, I must hope that I’m obedient enough to follow as He does.

Today was Remnant chapel. Boy was it fun! Our skits seemed like they flowed well, I didn’t notice anyone mess up their lines. The student body laughed at the funny skits, and you could hear a pin drop after the serious ones at the end (to use to metaphor, actually you couldn’t hear a pin drop because the floor was carpeted, but hey).

Now, it’s difficult to keep it in perspective, to not get a "big head." As people are telling me “good job” I want to be gracious and not get prideful. I am very pleased with how our skits have come together. Too many times skits written by Christians can be forced and err on the side of “cheese”. We tried to make skits that don’t show their hand till near the end and draw people into it, get their guard down and then come in with the message, but not overdo it with some long, sermonette monologue. I think we managed to do that.

To those that were in the peanut gallery. How did we do? What was your favorite skit, why? Could anything have been done better? Feel free to comment or send me an email.

At the end of my last semester I sat down with the check sheets for both my majors, Bible and Communication. My goal, to try to plot out what I needed to do to graduate in 4 years. Well, I was confronted by the fact that my majors didn’t really overlap. My calculations revealed that I needed to CLEP a course or take a summer school class to graduate on time. I also kind of wanted to take the 4th semester of Greek. So I decided to study and take the Algebra and American History CLEP tests.

Well, two weeks ago I passed the Algebra (as you can read in a post below) and this morning I passed the American History I. It wasn’t as hard as it could have been. I got a score of 65 (on a scale of 20 to 90), where the pass, fail line is 50. I am extremely grateful to the two people who I borrowed stuff from to study for. Thanks M. Thanks P.

It is a big relief. I feel better now about my decision to take the 4th semester of Greek, which I don’t need to graduate but I feel that it is important to have. I think I may actually petition to have Greek count as an elective (I may have some difficulty scheduling the last two semester with courses overlapping in time, etc.). If that works I won’t have to take 18 and 19 credits next year but 18 and 16, which would be very nice to have to bust my rear both semesters.

Do I have inalienable rights?

Talk to just about every American and I think you would get an affirmative answer. It is a basic assumption in our Declaration of Independence. “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”

Do I agree? No.

Everything that I am and that I have has been given to me by the One who created me. The idea of the word inalienable means that these things cannot be taken away. I’m sorry, but which one of the rights in that list is not easily denied? Give a person a knife and one strategic stab or slice and whoops, a person has just been deprived of their rights.

I do not believe in rights.

Since all that I am and have is a gift, and not mine intrinsically, do I have any platform to demand that I be given anything?

I do believe in valuing people.

Just because I don’t think I have any rights, doesn’t mean that I don’t think there are standards of conduct and propriety. One of the first things that scripture states is that I am made in the image of God, I am an image bearer. I am also told that God loves me and sent his son to die for me. Therefore my expectations of how people should treat me and how I should treat others flow from that fact, not from any sense of rights.

Why do I make this distinction, don’t I end up at the same place?

The way a person that believes in rights and a person who thinks like I do will probably behave very similarly. This is until a “wrong” is done to me. It seems to me that the idea of rights produces a form of pride and a feeling of entitlement. I cannot justify, in my mind, a position that will often leaving me looking to the heavens decrying the things I don’t like. I think that God’s plan does entail things that I don’t like. When this stuff happens should I protest that my rights have been violated? If God gave me inalienable rights would he violate them? That would be inconsistent on His part.

I am forced to conclude, I have no rights… except those things given to me which are temporary, provisional, and revocable.

Busy is a good descriptor of my life right now. It feels like I am practically on the move from when I get up at 6:30 till I go to bed at night. And ya'll out there wonder why I didn't try out for the musical... that's why.

Well anyway, Remnant had it's first "show" this Sunday. It was a youth group Super Bowl party. It was an easy show to start off with. We only did one really heavy skit (and I wasn't even in it), the rest were our funny stuff. We had some more stuff planned but when one of the members of the team is sick... it makes it interesting scrambling at the last minute to cover for her. Oh well, such is the nature of such things. We canned one of the skits that she was in and filled in for the rest.

All things considered we did a pretty good job. The youth group wasn't too responsive in terms of laughter. The room was big so it was hard to make out any laughter. I'm certain there was some, those skits are just too funny not to laugh (just come when Remnant does chapel Tues February 17th), but we just couldn't hear it. And some of the teens were practically gushing about how much they enjoyed some of the skits.

I'm excited about were Remnant will go, I'm not talking specifically about the various churches and schools, but about the ministry opportunity it affords. So many times I am skeptical at best about "Christian" skits, particularly adaptations of Biblical Material. Too many times it seems force, unnatural, surfacy. They tend to lack freshness. The skits that we have in our arsenal don't feel trite to me. Even the funny ones have a nugget of heart, something to provoke though. They each have a purpose and don't (In My Opinion of course) fall into the cliche nature of a lot of Christian drama.

I also look forward to the opportunity to get to know the rest of the team better. I respect every member of the group.

Well, I must get going. Oh, as a matter of curiosity if you read this could you comment? Not anything long, just a sentence. I know that I have one faithful commenter... I'm wondering how I might be able to increase some traffic and perhaps even get some discussion going on in the comment arena.

Well, the news came out yesterday. The musical Oklahoma! has been chosen as the spring semester show. This announcement has lead to a solid decision in my mind. I cannot possibly participate in this musical, I am simply too busy otherwise.

This decision, while not earth shattering, is a significant one. Theater is a major portion of my life. Acting and/or the technical side of theatre has consumed countless hours of my life. I can honestly say I love it. So, it is no light matter to decide not to even try out for the show. I have, in a way, agonized over this decision. No, I haven’t lost any sleep over it, but it makes me step back and evaluate my time.

As a double major in both Bible and Com. I’ve spend most of my time, probably taking Communication classes. I’m closer to that degree right now than I am the Bible degree. I’m looking down the road, anticipating seminary and then entering into some form of ministry, whether it be pastoral, parachurch, or remaining in the world of academia. I ask myself, what role will theatre have in my life? Will I be regaled to just a spectator. Will, perhaps I have a chance to you my talents in concert with whatever form of vocational ministry I enter into. Will I do community theatre on the side? I don’t know.

I’m grateful however that I am just a junior. I still have next year’s shows to look forward to. But I do want to be intentional in how I spend my time and efforts. While I love the theatre, it is not my goal in life.

The test results are in, I don't have to take a collegiate math course (for a Gen Ed requirement)!

I went in yesterday and took the College Algebra CLEP (R) test. I went in fairly confident, I had up to a semester of calculus in high school, I figured that I would be ok with algebra. So, I borrowed a couple of algebra textbooks, and flipped through the pages, reminding myself of concepts and formulas etc. I bought the study guide and worked through the problems. I got about half of them right, which was Ok because it said that the CLEP tests were designed so an average student just completing that subject would get about half of them correct. Since I had completely forgot how to use logarithms I figured I'd remind myself of a couple of things and I would be fine.

So I get to the testing center and I was told that the pass fail line was 50. I was also told that each question resulted in one point. All of a sudden my odds didn't seem so good. The test was only 60 questions long... missing less than ten seemed a bit difficult. But, I went though with the test and, actually, it didn't have as many hard problems as the study guide. As time wound down I got down to just 10 questions that I honestly didn't know if they were right. I figured, well I hope that I didn't make any stupid mistakes any of the other problems...

The score popped up on the screen.... I got a 69, wait, the test was only 60 questions long.... and it wasn't supposed to be a percentage. Well, it turned out that the raw score is put on a scale from 20 to 80 and 50 on that scale is the pass fail line.

So it's official... I think I can graduate on time!

Blogspot is watching....

How so you may ask, well they lift key words from the text of my posts and put advertisements up. I've been watching to banner ad up top that makes this little blog free, and it follows my posts pretty closely.

I use words like Christ, Christian, faith, crucifixion, ads for Bible study and Calvinistic materials appear.

I comment on attending a New Years eve party, ads for party supplies etc.

Now this is all well and good, but annoying at times.

For example, I commented on a major event in my cousin's life, getting a wife. I'm not going to use the w word, because it might trigger ads again for someone who will perform that ceremony for g@y couples (notice I'm afraid to see what the real spelling of that word will bring to the banner ad) or other related issues.

But, I'm not annoyed enough that I'll pay for the site that is free of ads.

Just remember, Blogspot is watching...

I normally would just up and advertise for something... but I am really looking forward to "The Passion of the Christ" coming out sometime next month. What I've read about it makes me very excited. It's about time someone put a more graphic crucifixion on the screen. It's too easy to replace the depth of Christ's sacrifice and suffering with the pop artwork with just a few streaks of blood.

I know that trailers can be cut to make any movie (well just about any movie) look good, but I like what I've seen to this date, check it out for yourself. http://www.thepassionofthechrist.com .

The other night my next door neighbor in the dorm decided that a couple of minutes right before quiet hours that he would blast some music. The RA told him to turn it down, but he retorted "Its not quiet hours yet!" This was at least the second time that I have heard him make that defense for his music. I got mad... it doesn't happen too much, but I did.

I marched over to his room and told him that we needed to talk. I told him that he was following the letter of the rule, but not the spirit. He thought I was over-reacting. I was, in the sense that I confronted him angrily. When the exchange was over I was convicted with how I handled the entire situation. I should have calmed down before I confronted him. So, I had to swallow my pride and the next day I asked him for forgiveness on how I handled myself.

But my quandary is how do I confront him in the future? Just yesterday I was in my room working on some homework and some very loud music came through the wall from him. Part of me wanted to go back over and sarcastically thanking him for the privilege of listening to his music even louder after it comes through the wall than I normally listen to music. It didn't help that the lyrics to a couple of songs didn't strike me as being particularly appropriate. I'm not in a position to dictate what he listens to, but I would rather not listen to that junk. I don't care how cool a song sounds... I care about its lyrics just as much if not more. Since I had just blown a confrontation the previous day I didn't go over to his room. He's established a pattern of behavior that concerns me to some extent... I guess I'll just have to play this one by ear (no pun intended).

Well, beyond this neighbor issue someone went out of their way to encourage me on Sunday. Saturday night some people came over to the dorm and hung out in my room for a while. Someone was looking at my bookshelf and I used that opportunity to tell the story how I had lent a copy of a book to a friend over the summer. That book was chewed up by his dog. I said I was probably going to get another one when I has some spare money. I didn't think much of the issue, I'm getting a lot of mileage over that book getting eaten, hey it's a funny story. Well when I got back from doing laundry on Sunday there was a package on my desk. One of the people who was in my room gave me a copy of my eaten book. It was a very thoughtful gesture. And for those of you keeping etiquette score out there, yes I did send a thank-you note.

Whenever someone steps out of their way to encourage me it challenges me. It makes me realize how little I truly do things for others. Sure, if something is on the way I'll probably do it. There are times in my life when I make a concerted effort to "bend over backwards" for a friend, but could I do more? Probably. I guess that is another thing to add to the list of things I want to emulate in my life... an encouraging and giving spirit.

Crazy
by Mercy Me

Why would I spend my life longing for the day that it would end?
Why would I spend my time pointing to another man?
Isn't that crazy?

How can I find hope in dying with promises unseen?
How can I learn Your way is better in everything I'm taught to be?
Isn't that crazy?

I have not been called to the wisdom of this world
But to a God who's calling out to me
And even though the world may think
I'm losing touch with reality,
It would be crazy to choose this world
Over eternity.

And if I boast let me boast in filthy rags made clean
And if I glory let me glory in my Savior suffering
Isn't that crazy?

And as I live this daily life I trust You for everything
And I will only take a step when I feel You leading me
Isn't that crazy?

Call me crazy, you can call me crazy.

Call me crazy.

Every so often someone comes alongside of me, not necessarily physically to encourage me in my education. Whether it is a gift of money or a book or something like that I am always a little amazed at it. These are typically people who are back home, I have little to no contact with them because I'm away at school so much.

Well, yesterday I got a postcard in the mail. Someone from around home decided to give me a gift subscription to the Biblical Archeology Review. In fact my first edition came today. Now, I have a pretty good idea who sent me this gift, and I am appreciative. The man in question doesn't know me very well, but probably the two times that I've interacted with him about some resource, it has been anonymously given to me. Last year I got the IVP Bible Background commentary set.

I find myself in a place where I would like to give him thanks, but I'm not certain how to do it. Since he hasn't identified himself I don't want to assume to much. Despite the fact that I'm 95% certain who these gifts are from (even there I'm assuming they are from the same source) it is only an inductive inference. Perhaps I will send a short note to be put in the church bulletin back home.

Being encouraged in such a fashion makes me pose the question, How do I encourage others? I probably should go out of my way more than I do... anyway, it's an interesting thought.

My freshman year I got up almost every morning to pray with a senior on the hall, the student body chaplain. That year saw some good things happen in my life. The act of focusing on God and praying for others helped to focus me spiritually. It was a discipline that I valued immensely. My sophomore year I tried to start something up like that. However, it didn't quite work. I didn't have the same motivation that I had the previous year. So, that discipline vanished. I can honestly say that last year saw some steps backwards for me in the area of spiritual discipline.

This isn't something that I enjoy admitting. It would be wonderful if I had it "all together," but I don't. So, why do I bring this up? This semester a friend on the hall approached me to ask to pray regularly. He and I prayed a couple of times last year when I had some things weighing on my heart. So this first week of school, every night we have sat down, talked and prayed. Just this week I have seen a very positive improvement in my attitudes and ability to avoid sin. Was it a perfect week? No. But, I am re-discovering what I should not have forgotten. When one is spending time with God, the sinful things that previously had so much appeal are seen for what they truly are, deadly.

It's a struggle to get my Christianity to be consistently expressed in all my actions. I would say the lesson of this week is to not forget the power of prayer and fellowship with other believers.

The room is now re-arranged, and a new bookshelf graces a wall… well it doesn’t grace it, but it is laden with books anyway. It was a good thing that I bought a new one, my old one was just too small to hold all that I wanted it to. I now feel like I have oodles of room. One of the nice things is that I was able to bring in some extra lighting so I don’t have to depend on the florescent bulb in the room. It makes for a much more warm feeling to the room. My list of things I need to pick up from Wal-Mart is growing though… I look at the list and dread the total of what it will cost me when I go. Oh, well soon enough I will be able to stop spending money almost entirely and resume saving.

On another note today is the first full day of classes. I have had two already with one more on the way for today. Philosophy and Film, Faith, and Popular Culture are the two I’ve had so far. Both classes look like ones that I will enjoy very much. The Philosophy class looks like it may be time consuming to read the assigned reading several times to grasp it. The Film class doesn’t look like it’ll take too much time relatively. It seems with the exception of the weekly quiz and the paper everything will be done in class.

The thing that makes this semester so exciting (well one of the things) is the focused nature of all my classes. I’m taking 5 classes that pertain to my major and only 1 gen ed class. I will be in the stuff that interests me most this semester, I will be able to have a narrower academic focus in a sense. Now, the flip side of the coin is that this could make the semester the hardest on record, I guess only time will tell.

Well, It's good to be back at school. I now begin the fun process of getting all my stuff unpacked and put away. I need to go to Staples and get another bookshelf, my storage situation is getting kind of rediculus. With the books I got this break I now have them laying all over the place, and more are on the way.

Classes start on Wednesday. I have tonight and tomorrow to get myself ready.

I just upgraded the RAM on my laptop (I went from 128 to 256). The improvement in performance is marked. I didn't expect it to make as big a difference as it did. It boots up faster and programs open and close faster. I am pleased.

Well, it is a New Year... but more practically it is about time for a new semester. I am looking forward to it very much. I will be taking:
Use of Old Testament in Hebrews (it's a Greek Class)
Philosophy and Christian Thought
Genre: Epistles
Defining Doctrines of the Christian Faith
Film, Faith, & Popular Culture
Physical Science Survey (hey, I have to get a science gen-ed in)
Yes, you did count right, that is 6 classes and at 3 hours each means that I will have 18 hours of classes. It's a heavy load, but with the exception of the Physical Science survey class they are all classes that I am looking forward to, and it's not that I think I won't like the science class; I think I will.

Also, I will probably be involved in some way with the spring show. I'm crossing my fingers that Mike will realize that a musical is not a good idea and will do another play. If it is a musical I'm not certain that I can be in the cast with everything I have going on... but I'll still be involved... Who am I kidding? I think it's physically impossible for me not to show up at an audition.

Another exciting thing about this upcoming semester is my involvement in a drama ministry team. We will finally pull together our skits and take them to various churches and schools. Spring break will include suffering in Florida while sharing our skits.

Finally, I'm looking forward to getting a room to myself. My roommate from last semester is moving off campus and I've secured the room for myself. Now, Tobe, if you read this I'm not saying "good-riddance." Your presence on the hall will be missed. It will be nice, however, to be able to turn off the light when I go to bed and turn it on right when I get up. I won't have to sneak around in the morning or night trying to avoid waking up a room-mate. And I will get to spread out, I know this is sad, but my room at home is smaller than my dorm room. (anyone who has seen Beta will realize this)

All these factors, and more that I won't bother to mention right now make me want to get back to school. I'll be heading up Monday morning. I love my family, but it's about time for this break to be over and the work to resume.